All posts filed under: teenager

A massive wave of jealousy and annoyance came over me – 12th June 1998

Originally posted on If Destroyed Still True:
Friday 12th [Cleo the cat’s hairs sellotaped in to my diary foreverrrrrr. Well, for 18 years. Still pretty gross.] An awful end to an awful week. Ralph hates me and I’m ill. We went to the cinema tonight with Emma, Freddie, Hayley, Lindsey Bullman, Georgia Dean, Safiyah L and Olivia. We all split up. Georgia and Safiyah saw Sliding Doors, Lindsey and Olivia saw Scream 2 and me, Ralph, Freddie, Emma and Hayley all went to see The Wedding Singer. It was quite a good film but Ralph went all miserable and sat on his own. Hayley said he said I was a bitch but Emma said he said an evil witch. Either way – BASTARD! Well, he wasn’t much company on the way to McDonald’s either. There were just the four of is coz Hayley went early with everyone else. He didn’t say one word to me. I don’t understand coz he spoke to me in school. I know he’s gone off me and doesn’t like me…

I might never get married. Who knows?! – 20th April 1998

Originally posted on If Destroyed Still True:
Monday 20thP. [Period.] It’s scary how fast time seems to be going at the moment. It hardly seems any time at all since I first started school in Year 7 and now I’m in Year 10 and more than half way through. It seems ages away until my major GCSE exams but everything is going so quickly. Back at school today. Back to normal. Normal shouldn’t be being at school but term time is the way it is more than anything else and it’s the routine I’ve got used to. I’d rather we had more holidays, even with the boring bits. That’s one advantage about school – I never seem to get bored. I mean, I don’t like some of the lessons much but I’m always doing something. Then at lunch and break I can catch up on all the gossip or watch Ralph and co playing sad little ball games on the tennis courts. I suppose if we didn’t have school then I would never have known…

He was nothing compared to Ralph! – 14th April 1998

Originally posted on If Destroyed Still True:
Tuesday 14thWe went ice skating today. There were loads if girls and Freddie. There was me, Emma, Rach, Georgia, Lena, Olivia, Rach’s sister and her mate and then Freddie. It was quite good actually and there was this lad in a green coat (who looked a bit like Ewan Swann) who kept “accidentally” falling into me. They all thought he fancied me. Maybe he did but he didn’t stand much of a chance coz he was nothing compared to Ralph! It’s snowing really heavily and it’s gone quite deep now. I really want a snowball fight with my mates tomorrow but I don’t think that there’s much chance of that happening coz Mum’s making me go shopping for new school stuff tomorrow and Abby and I have got a dentist appointment too. What a fun day I’m gonna have – NOT! I’m really worried that I’m going to run out of time to do my homework as well. I’ve only got two pieces but they’re really long and…

A Teenagers Writing: Paper Hearts

Originally posted on Everything and Nothing:
Hey guys, For this week, I decided to share this song I’d written. It’s based on Paper Towns a book by John Green and to be very honest it’s one of the very few books of his that I’ve actually liked…  So I decided to write a song? Well, something like that (because obviously, every time you read a book, you write a song for it :P) …. Let me know if you like it 🙂 Paper Hearts I watched the lightning strike, Watched it tear down trees, Thought of you and I, How we used to be. Saw all the memories again, In a split second, Felt the walls closing in, Felt all those stares. And I don’t want to stay no more, Living with these paper hearts, All over these paper towns, Watching every move we make, Forever. So let’s get away, We can just run away, To a better place, Where hearts don’t lie. Snuck of at dark, Never to return. Felt that long lost spark,…

The Outside World

Originally posted on Chitchat:
??? ???? ???? ?? ???I don’t quite have social anxiety. I don’t quite have social phobia. I think a lot of people see me as loud, confident and some maybe even think I voice my opinion too freely. That’s because when I’m passionate about a subject, I want to share that passion. A couple of years ago, after returning from a birthday party for one of my dad’s friends, I overheard him saying to his girlfriend “yeah, we’re both quite shy.”, the we in question being him and I. I’m not sure why, but I resented this.? I knew full well that it was true, that when I saw other kids my age I preferred to look down at my iPod or book because that’s what felt safer and that meeting new people made me so uncomfortable that it made me literally tremble. But I wanted to be outgoing and confident and funny. I knew I could be that person and I wanted to reflect that into reality but I just…