All posts filed under: society

For Us, For Them

My parents and long time boyfriends parents both came from dictatorships. They came to this country for a better life. When you are shaking in your sleep on the verge of tears and hear Trump supporters outside of your walls celebrating, fear feels like something you have to make friends with. I don’t want to become my parents who lived in so much fear that even once they moved to the U.S it was hard to talk about the past. Worried that someone might be listening and make them disappear. Straightening their hair to cover up their blackness in hopes of not being noticed. I do not want to and refuse to live my life that way. I will not be living in fear although it seems that now more than ever I will be living WITH it. America was always the girl who passively bullied us in school. Made us feel like we weren’t good enough and taunted us for the things we could never control, but would always say it was a joke…

An Angry World: Shooting Death of Philando Castile Marks a National Epidemic

Originally posted on The Neighborhood:
His energy ran low and he collapsed outside of the community church. Completely out of breath, Brooklyn looked up at the distinguished steeple and screamed at the top of his lungs, “Why don’t you help us! Why don’t you come back and help us!” – excerpt from An Angry World ? ? ⊕⊕⊕⊕⊕ Shooting Death of Philando Castile Marks A National Epidemic Falcon Heights Minnesota by Kendall F. Person Everything about this one was wrong, even this sentence. So many shootings of Black men in America by officers of the law who are sworn to protect and serve, occurring so often, that we now have frames of references. So openly violent, that if not for the entirety of the gripping and ultimately tragic video – the voice of the little girl, the darkness which amplified the sound, the epic breakdown of an incredibly strong woman, who held it together and broadcast her plight to the whole wide world – news of another shooting would have been garden variety and not even noticed outside of…

Does Living with the Olds = The Death of Romantic Relations?

Originally posted on rinse before use:
By now, we have come to terms with the fact that the old-school Alpha male is no more and that the dating world is full of mummy’s boys. Look, it’s one thing for a man to have a healthy relationship with his mother but how about when he is still living under mummy’s roof at in his 30s? The sad truth is it’s not just the guys. These days a growing number of people (us chicks included) in their late 20s/30s/40s/50s that still live with the Olds. In today’s post I’d like to establish the impact of this trend of living in close quarters with Mummy and Daddy has on our romantic development (or lack thereof). Let’s start by drawing on some real life inspiration. Recently I went on a date with someone who forewarned me that the night could not go on beyond 8pm as he had to be home for dinner because Mummy was preparing his favourite! (How sweet – NOT!) Naturally, I only went along with the date…

Age Doesn’t Matter, Maturity Does

Originally posted on Rosie Culture:
Even when I was immature I think I was more mature than most people my age. When I was younger I dated someone older than me and I thought that I would continue that pattern because guys my age or younger just seemed sooo immature. Your age and your maturity level don’t always correlate. People say girls mature faster than boys, which may be true, but really everyone is different based on their life experiences. Age differences don’t really matter. You can connect to someone 50 years older than you or 20 years younger than you. Dating someone younger or older than you really just depends on the maturity level. Some people are a couple years ahead on their maturity level and some people are a couple years behind. Both are completely fine. If you’re 23 and feel that you’re as mature as a 33 year old – that’s completely fine. And you could easily have a happy relationship with someone ten years older than you. But they would also…

Is Honesty Truly The Best Policy?

Originally posted on MiddleMe:
We often are caught in between in our lives, whether it is from one friend to another or an over caring relative asking when are you going to get married for the ample time or your mother asking you how is work. Unless you are going to dump all the work troubles like how your boss bullies you, your tea mates are shunning you because you are dating someone from the rival team and you just accidentally deleted an important file from your company’s data server, hoping no one will find out… All on your mother’s lap. No? Then you probably going to lie to your mother when you say “Everything’s fine at work, Ma. Oh, nothing beat your meatloaf! Can I have some to bring home?” This is a white lie. You do it because you don’t want your mother to worry about you and also you don’t want to go into lengths on how you happened to know someone from the rival team while gobbling down the delicious meatloaf.…

For Better, For Worse, or For Now?

*Disclaimer: for those of you that don’t pick up internet sarcasm well, in this post it’s everything written in italics. When I was in high school I used to jokingly say that I was probably going to get married twice. According to various articles, this joke is highly likely to be my reality. It’s commonly referred to as a starter marriage or beta marriage. For the past five or so years previous generations have been writing about how generation y is ruining changing the institution of marriage. The typical posts talk about how we’re getting married sooooo much later. Apparently we’re more likely to get married at 27 (women) and 29 (men) than 20 (women) and 23 (men). I guess it’s preferred that we pop out children right after high school, although we had to get permission to use the bathroom just 10 minutes ago. Some writers have even referenced television shows that perpetuate this behavior. The one thing these articles all have in common? Blaming social media, dating apps, and other forms of technology for our “change of …

Why Parenting Sucks as a “Millennial”

I am considered a millennial. For you were to look up the exact definition it’s: a person reaching young adulthood around the year 2000. Spoiler alert-I don’t agree but I digress. I still became a beautiful bright eyed adult around 2003 and was whisked off to the fabulous world of corporate America ripe for the picking. At 18, you would not have caught me even considering having a child. I didn’t think I would ever change my mind. I wanted to be the Mecca of business women and there was no stopping me. Sure, the idea of being that into myself and the money world wore of very quickly ( I’m not a money baby, no matter how hard I tried to fit in the box, I just want to be outside gardening) but I didn’t really change my baby making mind until I got married. Or maybe when I met my husband. There’s that background. Let me get to the suck part. I just spent the entire morning at my desk trying to figure…

Real People

Originally posted on Pos+ Casts:
I love seeing the “real” in people. I do not care about the face that they put on for the outside world. I do not care who they know, where they have been, or where they are from. I want to know how those things shaped them into who they are now. What do/did they get out of meeting those people or experiencing those thing. Everyone has a level of depth. I like to see how deep they can go. What is the truest version of this person? What is real? What are they putting on for show? What makes them tick? Do they have passions? What are their fears? I want to learn about them. I want to know. I want to see the madness, and the insanity inside of them. I want to see our similarities and differences. I want to hear their opinions and thoughts. To see what they love and how they would react. Everything that they are afraid to let out, I want to know. I want…

Expectations Suck

Originally posted on Pos+ Casts:
I am a classic people pleaser. I don’t know how it happened or why I do it but I can not help but want to please everyone. I don’t mind it most of the time because I get an immense amount of gratification from it. I like that the people around me are happy. It makes me really happy too. I want everyone to be having a good time so I help facilitate it. I also know how most of my close friends will react to certain situations or what they are sensitive about so I try my hardest to cater to their needs. The problem that most people see with being a people pleaser is that you forget about yourself. Which I sometimes have a habit of doing but I honestly don’t mind. Hell, sometimes I don’t even notice. The major problem that I face or the thing that gets to me the most is when expectations arise. Because I do all of these things for people over and…