And this. G.U.M Team
Just a little humor to make your hump day even better. What would you do? G.U.M Team
L and M are sitting at a restaurant table. There is only one piece of bread left. L – You want a piece of my bread? M – Yeah! (Goes to pick up knife) L – Don’t use a knife! I don’t know if I trust you! Pull. M – (Slightly offended) Fine bruh, but I pull big! They both pull with aggressiveness. G.U.M Team
D and M pull up to D’s childhood home, where her (highly religious) mother currently lives. They are in college on fall break. M parks the car. D – Fuck-shit-damn-bitch. M – (Bursts into laughter) What the hell is wrong with you? D – I gotta get all my swear words out before I see my mom. Feel free to share your funny conversations or home visit experiences during college below or at firstname.lastname@example.org! G.U.M. Team
A friend of mine posted this as their fb status and I had to share it with the world. These are two people I was friends with in college. Let’s call them R and T. Two fellow millennials. T: R. We need to talk. R: Uh oh. What happened? T: *Deep sigh* I just broke a mirror. R: T. Did you pray about it? T: I’m praying now! Pray with me! R: I’ve broken many mirrors and I’m still thriving. T: You’re so right. *Sings* When Jesus sayyyy yes, nobody can say no! Ok. That’s all I wanted. Pizza, Netflix, and Happiness. Mei.
Me: Gracias Her: Nevada Me:
Meanwhile, in Hobby Lobby… (He’s Patrick, I’m Spongebob) Him: You see that tribal pattern? That’s what I want on my back. Me: In the cross? Him: Yeah. It would look great inside of me. It would look great on my back. Me: What did you say? Him: *Shakes head* Me: I heard you.