All posts filed under: Satire

Dear Anyone: Notice Me, Please.

Originally posted on Unemployed and Unenthused:
I’ve mentioned before that I don’t think any of my cover letters have ever been read.  I believe this to still be the case.  If they had been, somebody would surely have contacted me by now.  I can’t say that every letter has been 100% original, but I can say that each one has contained something that should make a hiring authority either want to know more or question my sanity.  Here are the excerpts… “Dear Martha Stewart (or appropriate hiring authority):” “Some people see life as an epic poem — a hero navigating trials and temptations, eager to please the gods but cursed with all the flaws of mortality.  I find these people insufferable.” “I recently finished a fourteen lecture audiobook titled A Way With Words: Writing, Rhetoric, and the Art of Persuasion — presumably because I need more friends.” “Everybody hates a stylized resume that’s trying too hard — my apologies in advance for the wacky PDF I uploaded in lieu of a standard resume.  It’s just that…

Are No Cartoon Marriages Sacred?

Originally posted on Cookies + Sangria:
If you are the kind of person who hates change, you would probably like being a cartoon character. Your whole wardrobe would be stocked with the same one outfit, it is usually the same vague season unless it is Christmas or Halloween, and you never move house (for more than an episode) because that would mean swapping your whole cast of characters. Oh, and if you were married, you stayed married. That was before. Now the sanctity of cartoon marriage is under attack, and I, for one, will not stand for it. It started when news leaked of a Homer and Marge Simpson separation. They have children. And now Kermit and Miss Piggy? They don’t have children … thank God… and they aren’t technically cartoons, they’re puppets… but seriously, won’t someone think of the adults? We don’t like this either. So from this point, I will not wait for the cartoon divorce announcements to come rolling in. These fake marriages are sacred, and if anyone is going to say whether or not they…

Millennial Humor: Millennials Guide to Baby Boomers

This is a satire. Some nice dry humor to start your day. This is more of a Monday post, but whatever. I don’t agree with everything said about baby boomers, and obviously the “explanation” doesn’t apply to all Millennials. I’d like to think this video is dedicated to the Baby Boomers that are always trash talking and generalizing all Millennials. Enjoy! G.U.M Team