All posts tagged: Marriage

More Than a Bride

A funny thing happened when I got engaged. After nearly a year of engagement, it’s no longer comical. I’m having trouble being polite about it now. I’m starting to wish I had eloped. I became nothing more than a bride. With the exception of my closest friends, it seems no one knows what to say to me except, “How is the wedding planning going?” Maybe this wouldn’t be a problem if I had more interest in planning my wedding. But I am the world’s most lackadaisical bride. I’m the polar opposite of a bridezilla. Case in point: When my mother freaked out about how we were going to decorate the stage for the ceremony (nine months before my wedding), I appeased her by saying we could add some plants. She asked what type of plants I wanted. I replied, “Green ones.” People I have known for years no longer have anything to say to me except to ask about my wedding. People I barely know have offered to help plan it. People are also great …

I’m Not Sold On Relationships

Originally posted on Rosie Culture:
I’m not sold on relationships. I’m not sold on the idea of only being with one person for the rest of your life. Because I’m only in my 20’s and feel like I’ve been 10 different people already. How can someone tolerate that much growth in their self, let alone someone else? Plus all I’ve seen is the divorce rate sky-rocket. I’m not sold on fairytale romances where you meet “the one.” There are SO many people in the world and we’re only exposed to a small portion, even with the Internet. What are the chances you met “the one” at college in your home state? I’m not sold on dedicating your life to someone else. I don’t think it’s a bad thing to be a little selfish, but in a relationship you shouldn’t be selfish at all. I’m not sold on the dynamic most relationships adapt. Just settling into the first thing that comes your way, changing your dreams for someone else. You had plans to move out of…

For Better, For Worse, or For Now?

*Disclaimer: for those of you that don’t pick up internet sarcasm well, in this post it’s everything written in italics. When I was in high school I used to jokingly say that I was probably going to get married twice. According to various articles, this joke is highly likely to be my reality. It’s commonly referred to as a starter marriage or beta marriage. For the past five or so years previous generations have been writing about how generation y is ruining changing the institution of marriage. The typical posts talk about how we’re getting married sooooo much later. Apparently we’re more likely to get married at 27 (women) and 29 (men) than 20 (women) and 23 (men). I guess it’s preferred that we pop out children right after high school, although we had to get permission to use the bathroom just 10 minutes ago. Some writers have even referenced television shows that perpetuate this behavior. The one thing these articles all have in common? Blaming social media, dating apps, and other forms of technology for our “change of …

Things to Consider Pre-Marriage

I recently received some unsolicited, though much appreciated, advice from a few elders about relationships. Though I am quite a few years away from marriage, they had a few tips on things to do before considering marriage. I would be selfish if I didn’t share. 1. Talk about the life you desire If nothing else, discuss marriage and children. If your significant other doesn’t want either and you do, you can stop right here. 2. Take note to their behavior …especially the little things. Don’t overlook the big things (i.e. arguments) either. Just pay attention to everything. As the saying goes, when people show you who they are, believe them. 3. Travel together Travel can be stressful. Long car rides, enclosed spaces, and plans gone wrong can bring out the worst in people. Going on a trip is a great way to see how well your partner handles you in high stress situations. 4. Live together This one is debatable. Some studies show that couples that live together before marriage tend to have a higher divorce rate. I don’t know …

When Women Become Adults

Originally posted on Sex and Living with Your Parents:
I’ll start by saying that the inspiration for writing this came to me when I read this article by The Atlantic, “When are you really an adult?” It’s on my mind a lot. After all, I live with my parents. Unfortunately, I think our culture gets it straight up wrong when it comes to women becoming adults. A gown up woman is what I need to be, or so I’ve heard. If I’m not actively dating anyone, it means I’ve eschewed marriage all together. I’m asexual. I would not be discussing this topic if people were not so damn presumptuous with me on the topic of getting married or having children. Maybe some sense in me a sign of struggle when they look at my tired eyes. The truth is, I am struggling. The difference between their perceptions and my own is that any time I’m “struggling,” it’s because I’m single. It’s like Sesame Street. S for struggle. S for single. They must go together, Eureka!…

Why We Settle And Why I Get It

Originally posted on Rosie Culture:
Relationships are a fragile thing. One string becomes frayed, it gets snagged, and the whole thing unravels into your hands. You never saw it coming. Basically since the start of this blog, I’ve expressed my fears on settling. Especially settling for someone you don’t really love. Settling for less than fireworks, all in romance, and perfection in a relationship. It’s easy to see how often relationships don’t work out. People get married at 24 and 50 years later they hate each other but still live under the same roof. They have kids and argue in front of them. They get a divorce and live bitterly. They miss out on a chance at happiness and a fulfilling life because they settled. They tried to make something work that just wasn’t going to work. We get to an age where we’re supposed to get married. It’s the time to settle down. You need someone to move in with, you need extra health benefits, you need the extra paycheck, your biological clock is…

I might never get married. Who knows?! – 20th April 1998

Originally posted on If Destroyed Still True:
Monday 20thP. [Period.] It’s scary how fast time seems to be going at the moment. It hardly seems any time at all since I first started school in Year 7 and now I’m in Year 10 and more than half way through. It seems ages away until my major GCSE exams but everything is going so quickly. Back at school today. Back to normal. Normal shouldn’t be being at school but term time is the way it is more than anything else and it’s the routine I’ve got used to. I’d rather we had more holidays, even with the boring bits. That’s one advantage about school – I never seem to get bored. I mean, I don’t like some of the lessons much but I’m always doing something. Then at lunch and break I can catch up on all the gossip or watch Ralph and co playing sad little ball games on the tennis courts. I suppose if we didn’t have school then I would never have known…

It’s been…. 2 1/2 months?!

Originally posted on Fitness, Health & Everything Else:
Wow, my last blog post was in August?! That’s actually more recent than I was expecting! I have taken a very long hiatus from fitness, health, and everything else. This year my life has undergone an extreme makeover, with good, bad, ugly, and irony. 10 1/2 months ago in January I never would have imagined my life to take the drastic turn it did. Cliff notes: I am freshly divorced, as of about a month ago. Well, technically all the papers need to be signed and sent off to the judge, but Derek and I filed, you get the idea. I won’t go into detail, but let’s just say we were both unhappy and with our lifestyles at the time, the issues we were experiencing would not have received the proper attention they needed. So, we decided to set each other free, focus on ourselves as individuals, and experience new separate lives. Even though I was a train wreck over the entire situation 2 months ago, I can honestly…